I cannot seem to stop crying for more than a few hours today. At least this time, I know why I'm crying. Max got a terrible phone call yesterday that his younger brother was in the hospital in southern California. Today he had some sort of surgery to try to figure out what was going on with his insides. The doctor says that he has very advanced colon cancer that has already started to spread to other parts of his body. The doctors are going to start him on chemo very soon but the outlook is really bad right now. Max thinks he's going to head out there this weekend to help him put his affairs in order. I don't think most 40 year old single people with no kids even have wills. I imagine they have a lot of work to do.
Despite the fact that this totally sucks for the brother, what's really not fair is how hard this family has been hit.
Everyone but Max's mom has had a life-long autoimmune disease. Max's brother got the bad one, Crohn's Disease, which their dad also had. Max got off fairly easy with psoriasis. It affects him daily, but it's definitely just a skin thing. Thank goodness his insides are okay.
Their mom lives outside of Phoenix, and she has been living with breast cancer for a few years now. She's usually okay, but she has been in the hospital a couple times in the last year. Max's dad died several years ago from skin cancer. What the hell did this family do to deserve all of this? Even the cat has a thyroid condition.
I feel badly that Max's family isn't close geographically. I've never met anyone in the family, but I have spoken with his mom and brother on the phone before.
Is my family the rarity in that we haven't been plagued by disease? If so, thank g-d for that. However, it's just so sad that they keep getting sick. Will Max follow suit? Will his luck pass to me? After all, I haven't heard from the doctor about the lab work from my biopsy from last week. Can you imagine if I have to pile a bad report on top of this?
It feels good to just be able to put this out there without you all trying to stop my tears. I've been a big crybaby lately, and I just feel bad that Max has gotten the brunt of it. Y'all aren't going to dance around naked trying to get me to laugh like he does. Are you?
Weigh in tomorrow. At least I don't think I've gained. We'll see about the loss. Three different scales (mine, Max's, WW) tell three different stories. I'll cross my fingers!